Power Flower, a Pooping Pug, and More Weird Stories From the Front Lines of Cannabis Retail

TRUE TALES

Off the Charts Flower Results

We started using an ISO-accredited lab and sent in a flower test sample that came back at 27% THC with 5.5% TERPS. A week later, we received a mass email from the lab stating how it was almost impossible to get over 5% terpenes and it was even more extremely rare for that to be accompanied by high THC as well. I guess we broke the scale! — BRANDON G., NORTH POLE, AK

TRUE TALES

Dog Days of Summer

I was budtending on the medical side of the dispensary, helping out a regular patient. He asked if he could bring his dog in with him, a pug, and because it was so hot outside, I said of course. All of a sudden, 5 minutes into the transaction, I begin smelling dog poop. I peak around the register, and sure enough, not only had the patient’s pup gone No. 2, but the patient had stepped all in it with his sandals. I politely asked him to stand still while I went to get a plastic bag and some cleaning supplies. Upon my return to the front of the store, the patient had tracked the dog poop all over the dispensary floor. I gave him the plastic bag for his sandals and finished up his transaction as fast as I could. The patient walked out bare-footed and I proceeded to clean and disinfect the tile floor right after he left. Safe to say, that was the last time the patient brought his pug in with him to shop for his medicine. — Kevin O., Pueblo, CO

BLUNT TALK

What You Wish You Said (But Didn’t) to That Clueless Customer

“We don’t sell cigarettes. We sell vapes. In fact, it says it on the big sign over the door you just walked through!” — ANONYMOUS BRAIN SQUADDER, AUSTIN, TX